When you get insight on this, you will learn why that movie is your favorite, or why you love those songs. There is a certain kind of narrative you are attracted to.

To begin to understand why the fear is there, we begin by understanding the difference between shame and guilt. Guilt is when you feel bad about what you have done. Shame is when you feel bad about who you are.

If you believe this fear about yourself, you will prove to people how they need you.

When you face that kind of humiliation, you have to learn who you are. On those hills of life you have to shift into first gear, and if you don’t, you’re stuck.

“aware and learning.”

whatever it is we need to identify what we run to for comfort when we feel afraid. Most people aren’t even aware that they’re running to it. As we become aware and stop running to it, the pain comes to the surface and we can process it.

Eventually you will gain deep clarity on what that one fear is for you and you will recognize proving and hiding in the small moments.

Most people don’t realize that the false narrative we have bought into—the story we’re living out that’s driving us from a core fear—can be understood if we search within. Every day we are trying to get something from others to meet the insecure need of our identity.

Find someone you can talk to about what’s happening, someone who you don’t have to posture and pretend with.