in the past, our social lives were primarily dictated by rules, duty, obligation, and commitment. And in the other parts of the world, it still is. That is how social living is organized. You don’t go to see your grandparents because you feel like it. You go because you have to, because it’s what you do. We have replaced commitments with feeling,... See more

I always make the distinction between love stories and life stories. There’s many more people you can love than people you can have a life with.

In Freudian language, ambivalence is the ability to hold contradictory feelings toward a person. A child loves their mother, but can also sometimes be extremely angry at her. A person holds love and hate, attraction and disgust, excitement and boredom, connection and disconnection with a person. The ability to be able to hold these contradictions... See more

But choice is not the same as freedom. Freedom is actually the ability to make a choice in the middle of restrictions.

historically, marriage was an economic arrangement between families. And now it’s an identity project — two individuals seeking self-actualization