Feeling seen · Molly Mielke

Providing this acknowledgement for the people you love is something that I think we could all get better at. Validating the other person’s perspective, reacting and explaining your own, maybe sending a smile. Just like the silence in Wong Kar-Wai’s corridor scene, it’s not just about what is said, it’s about what is unsaid: I see you, I’m here for ... See more

The little things you do for others that remind you both of who you are, matter. They’re what define the thread count of the human experience

I’ve found a deep sense of purpose in dedicating myself to bettering the lives of the people I love.

Being a woman in a male-dominated industry has made me very aware that this culture is sorely lacking something I am naturally able to provide in spades. Not in a way that saps me of energy or makes me feel like a martyr, but in a way that feels fulfilling and grounding in my sense of self.

Acknowledging existence requires real, personalized effort — something that tapping your screen to heart react will never fulfill.

And perhaps more personally, you’ll uncover a secret — that being your best for others is the easiest way to discover a deep sense of acknowledgement and meaning for yourself.

I deeply dislike this zero sum approach to love and intend to devote my life to disproving it. I’m willing to bet good money (or support) that if you try giving those you love the acknowledgement that they clearly need, you’ll find that you probably possess a lot more love to give than you thought.

But this leaves me wondering: why is this so rare? How did we get to a place where genuinely caring for those around you is perceived as "special"? Why do we starve each other of compassion and support?

The little things you do for others that remind you both of who you are, matter. They’re what define the thread count of the human experience. It’s micro gestures like small smiles, arm squeezes, and “hey you”s that root us in our sense of self without committing to the relationship’s definition beyond momentary shared space. As Philippe Rochat put... See more

Should women have to do this emotional work? Absolutely not — and most don’t have the capacity to. But my decade of being pushed to the extreme in this regard has enabled me to feel fully comfortable setting boundaries to the support I provide. In defining my own capacity, I am able to shape this skill into something that serves me.