False Narratives and Peanut Butter

I solely identified with expectations that weren’t really mine, and with the stories that ran on loop in my head. I didn’t know it then, but I was aware of only a small slice of reality, one that was keeping me trapped in a body that was constantly aching and burning out, and in a mind that was full of emotional anguish, resentment, and bitterness.

I want to make sure you understand that past pain in your life is causing your brain to force a false narrative regarding your identity. The reason you believe a lie about who you are is because the pain you have experienced traumatized you to suffocate under the voice of shame. Shame blocks the voice of who you are.

My high sensitivity had to be suppressed to make it in this world that I built for myself. The more I tried to fill the void I felt inside with external and ephemeral supply, like praises, validation, alcohol, relationship drama, or more diplomas, the more I self-sabotaged, destroyed what was actually good for me, and moved further and further away