Exhausted Wives, Bewildered Husbands: Why your marriage is hurting, and how to blossom as a couple

External pressure to change results in changes which last only as long as the external force continues to exist. The exhausted wife envisions a world wherein her husband only changes so long as she continues to rain pressure down on his head, where she continues to be the “naggy and bitchy” person she hates that she’s become.

all else fails, ask your partner how you seem most often. Do you seem constantly angry but don’t realize it?

Their partner is now a liability and every discussion is a tactical maneuver to trick the opposing party into stumbling toward the secret goal.

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Usually, one person has seized control of decision making while the other sits on the sidelines pouting.

In fact, the worse she gets, the closer you are to breaking through her final line of defense. She is becoming invested, starting to hope, and that terrifies her.

the beginning of their marriage, communication skills were poor. One or both partners were unable to state clearly what they expected or wanted from a partner. Long term goals were vague, while short term wants and needs were kept silent.

Simmering dissatisfaction stews just under the surface of their desperate clawing for approval, and this resentment explodes to the surface in patterns of frequent displays of hurtful anger, followed by a plunge deeper into doormat behavior as they fearfully seek to avoid abandonment for having lashed out.

Paired with this onslaught of passive-aggressive attacks is the more common doormat mentality. The detached person spends most of their time in this passive, reactive state. The detached person believes they have no innate self-worth in relationships, so they must create that worth through works. The detached person can never say no to a request fr