Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.

Antonio Damasio reminds us, “We are not necessarily thinking machines.10 We are feeling machines that think.”

wholeheartedness. In The Gifts of Imperfection, I define wholeheartedness as “engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness.3 It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect

Trust is the stacking and layering of small moments and reciprocal vulnerability over time. Trust and vulnerability grow together, and to betray one is to destroy both.

When we’re in tough rumbles with people, we can’t take responsibility for their emotions. They’re allowed to be pissed or sad or surprised or elated. But if their behaviors are not okay, we set the boundaries: I know this is a tough conversation. Being angry is okay. Yelling is not okay. I know we’re tired and stressed. This has been a long meeting

Turn & Learn. We all get Post-it notes and write down how long we think a project is going to take, and if we’re looking at several projects that we need to prioritize, we’ll write the projects in priority order. Once everyone has written down an estimate or priority ranking in private, we count to three and show our answers. This practice cont

Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.

Feeding people half-truths or bullshit to make them feel better (which is almost always about making ourselves feel more comfortable) is unkind. Not getting clear with a colleague about your expectations because it feels too hard, yet holding them accountable or blaming them for not delivering is unkind. Talking about people rather than to them is

the Stockdale Paradox was named after Admiral Jim Stockdale, who spent eight years as a prisoner of war in Vietnam. He was tortured more than twenty times during his imprisonment from 1965 to 1973. In addition to fighting to stay alive, he worked every day to help the other prisoners survive the physical and emotional torment. When he interviewed S

Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, and joy. We know that vulnerability is the cornerstone of courage-building, but we often fail to realize that without vulnerability there is no creativity or innovation.