“Each time you learn to act as if you are valuable, not desperate, you make it easier the next time,”

“a healthy neutrality.”

Let others say those words and learn to listen—not fix—when they do.

We need to invite emotions into our lives. Then make a commitment to take gentle, loving care of them. Feel our feelings. Trust our feelings and trust ourselves. We are wiser than we think.

Giving ourselves what we need means we become, as the Reverend Phil L. Hansen suggests, our personal counselor, confidante, spiritual advisor, partner, best friend, and caretaker in this exciting, new venture we have undertaken—living our own lives.

Watch a television program. Find a way to emotionally, mentally, and (if necessary) physically separate yourself from whatever you are reacting to.

But, after we’ve detached and taken our grip off the people around us, what’s left? Each of us is left with ourselves.

Make other people do what you want them to.

“Sounds like you’re having a problem. What do you need from me?” Learn to say, “I’m sorry you’re having that problem.” Then, let it go. We don’t have to fix it.