In fact, when we respond emotionally, we often don’t even realize that we’re in a position that calls for thinking at all. When you are possessed by the moment, all the reasoning tools in the world won’t help you.

When our unthinking reactions make situations worse, that little voice in our head starts to beat us up: “What were you thinking, you idiot?” The truth of the matter is, you weren’t thinking. You were reacting, exactly like the animal you are. Your mind wasn’t in charge. Your biology was.

For more, see “Three Filters Needed to Think Through Problems,” Farnam Street (blog), December 14, 2015, https://fs.blog/garrett-hardin-three-filters/.

At Farnam Street we use this example in our course Decision by Design, where we teach world-class people to make better decisions. (If you want to be added to the waitlist, just email me at shane@fs.blog with the subject line “DBD Waitlist.”)

learned this firsthand at operational meetings. Only the person in charge of the operation could define the objective, the goals, and the problems. Everyone else could suggest things but one person had to own the decision, and that person was in charge of the operation. It’s been reinforced many times by Adam Robinson, Peter Kaufman, and Randall

Two effective questions I ask my kids to slow them down and have them think: (1) Do you want to put water or gasoline on this situation? And (2), Is this behavior going to get you what you want?

I use a version of this on my kids. “Is this behavior moving you closer to what you want or further away?” It’s amazingly effective.

Improving your judgment, it turns out, is less about accumulating tools to enhance your rationality and more about implementing safeguards that make the desired path the path of least resistance. It’s about designing systems when you’re at your best that work for you when you’re at your worst. Those systems don’t eliminate the defaults, but they do

Often people think the world should work differently than it does, and when they don’t get the outcomes they want, they try to wiggle out of responsibility by blaming other people or their circumstances.[1] Avoiding responsibility is a recipe for misery, and the opposite of what it takes to cultivate good judgment.