Better Than Before: What I Learned About Making and Breaking Habits--to Sleep More, Quit Sugar, Procrastinate Less, and Generally Build a Happier Life

(Side note: people weigh their highest on Sunday; their lowest, on Friday morning.)

I was pouring energy into changing my habits, yet when I asked myself, “What change would add more happiness to my life?” none of my habits addressed an issue at the top of my list:

(I find it much more satisfying to walk with a purpose: to go to a favorite coffee shop, to hike to the top of the mountain.)

I now pay very close attention to the first few times I do anything because I know those decisions will shape my baseline habits; to deviate from them will feel like a deprivation or an imposition.

Many assume that offering a reward will help people to jump-start a healthy habit, which will then persist after the reward fades away. Not so. Often, as soon as the reward stops (and sometimes before it stops), the behavior stops.

“But I drink so much. I should at least cut back.” “But why?” I pressed. “Enjoy it! Samuel Johnson said, ‘All severity that does not tend to increase good, or prevent evil, is idle.’ A habit isn’t bad unless it causes some kind of problem.”

When it’s not apparent that a habit has value, people are less likely to follow it. People often stop taking their medication when they don’t see an obvious connection between the medicine and their condition—

The happiest and most successful people are those who have figured out ways to exploit their Tendency to their benefit and, just as important, found ways to counterbalance its limitations.

For an Upholder, a habit that’s a source of control might have special appeal; for a Questioner, curiosity; for an Obliger, cooperation; for a Rebel, challenge.