An under-appreciated secret to solving problems is just naming what the problem is explicitly, rather than stewing in silence and waiting for reality to sort it out like a character in a movie. It's a vital life skill that, funnily enough, few people talk about. (More below.)... See more

Let’s say you want to name a problem in one of your relationships, but you’re worried that presenting the problem would start an argument. Congratulations. You have now found the problem to name. You are allowed to say the following: “There’s an issue I see in our relationship, and I want to address it so our relationship is stronger. But I’m... See more

This is a classic prompt in the practice of nonviolent communication (NVC). When asked in the right setting it creates an opportunity to clear your emotional cobwebs in front of an active listener, often a stranger. It narrows the focus of both parties to the present moment and is a profoundly effective practice of building empathy both for oneself... See more