Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson

If you saw people around you taking time to care for themselves, filling up their cups when they were tired, taking care of their health and valued emotional health by being open about their feelings, you would grow up to have a belief that the health of your inner world is a priority.

If our emotional needs were fulfilled by our parents, we emerge from childhood with a trust that others can give us what we need. We can then receive love from others without distress or compulsion. Our needs are moderate. We can trust someone to help fulfill our needs while we help fulfill hers. This provides a foundation for a life of compassion

When internalizing children have self-involved parents, they often think that being helpful and hiding their needs will win their parents’ love. Unfortunately, being counted on isn’t the same thing as being loved, and the emotional emptiness of this strategy eventually becomes apparent. No child can be good enough to evoke love from a highly self-i

In attention, you are heard and noticed. In acceptance, you are embraced as worthy, not compared to your siblings but trusted, empowered, understood, and fully approved of as you are in your uniqueness. You sense a kindly support of your path, no matter how unusual; of your feelings, no matter how disturbing; of your deficiencies, no matter how irr

If you grew up putting others first too much, you may end up living a life of reaction rather than one of fulfillment. Instead, you can learn to become your own champion and protector, valuing and supporting who you are on the inside. The self-awareness you gain will center and ground you in your true self. Finding your authentic self is an enliven