Rather than immediately stepping in to fix conflicts or ease discomfort, these parents empower their kids to navigate challenges themselves. Instead of dictating solutions, they ask:

“What do you think we could try to make this better?”

“Would you like some ideas, or do you want to try something first?”

5 Steps of Emotional Regulation in Children

• Children progress through five stages of emotional regulation, from least to most helpful.


• Externalizing aggression (anger outbursts) and withdrawal/internalizing (shutting down) are the least helpful.


• Avoidance (not addressing conflicts) is also destructive.


• Help-seeking is a more advanced stage, and

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