Decades of research, as well as common experience, have shown the truth of the adage “You are only as happy as your unhappiest child.”

No one—not a single person out of a thousand—said that to be happy you should try to work as hard as you can to make money to buy the things you want. No one—not a single person—said it’s important to be at least as wealthy as the people around you, and if you have more than they do it’s real success. No one—not a single person—said you should choo

The view from the end of the life span is straightforward: time well and enjoyably spent trumps money anytime.

The Fifth Lesson: Don’t Just Commit to Your Partner—Commit to Marriage Itself

Tip 3: Watch out for teasing. Ben Santorelli and his wife eliminated one way of relating that they found dangerous, a strategy that could be emulated by many couples: AFTER WE GOT MARRIED, we went through sort of a teasing phase, and it was getting out of hand. So we made a pact that we wouldn’t tease the other person at all, and it really helped.

The Fourth Lesson: Talk to Each Other

way you can make a marriage work is to have both parties give 100 percent all the time.” It began to make sense: you can’t be calculating 50 percent in, 50 percent back. The attitude has to be one of giving freely. And if you start keeping score, you are already in trouble.

“The only

The Third Lesson: Don’t Keep Score