1001 Dad Jokes: Dads' Ultimate Collection of Laugh-Out-Loud, Gut-Busting Gags (1001 Jokes and Puns)

I’m not a competitive person. And I’ll be the first to admit it…

Welcome to the Plastic Surgery Addiction Support Group. I see lots of new faces.

I got this puppy for my wife. I think it was a fair trade.

Apple have said that although their profits are down, their turnover is still good.

I had a great day at work today. We got a delivery of bubble wrap so I asked the boss what he wanted done with it. ‘Just pop it in the corner’ he said. Best eight hours I’ve ever spent.

I signed up for a ‘Learn How to Levitate’ course but it never got off the ground.

My therapist told me I have problems verbalising my emotions. I can’t say I’m surprised.

What’s the oldest age someone can have a circumcision? I just want to know the cut-off date.

Child psychologist? No thanks. I’d rather see an adult one.