Sonya Sukalski
@sonyasukalski
Retired in 2022. I enjoy writing, gardening, hiking, biking, and new ideas.
Sonya Sukalski
Belonging : Belonging is the innate human desire to be part of something larger than us . Because this yearning is so primal , we often try to acquire it by fitting in and by seeking approval , which are not only hollow substitutes for belonging , but often barriers to it . Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic ,
... See moreThe fatigue of grief is fucking staggering.
Rob Delaney • A Heart That Works
I wish I knew more the context for this quote, and I thank whoever it was that put Rob Delaney’s book on my radar! It has been hard to account for the fatigue. It feels like I do nothing but wait around in the transfusion clinic or at the hospital. And then give up more of what I thought made my life fulfilling. Not that those things really do, or that they are more important than being with my spouse through his bone marrow transplant story. But yeah, the fatigue is real.
Have you heard this story: Woman learns she has cancer, six months to live. Within days she quits her job, resumes the dream of writing Tex-Mex songs she gave up to raise a family (or starts studying classical Greek, or moves to the inner city and devotes herself to tending babies with AIDS). Woman's friends think she's crazy; she herself has never
... See moreSteven Pressfield • The War of Art
I wonder how doing what we love affect the very ability of our body to heal, to turn genes on and off, to become more resilient, body, mind, and soul?
The tricky part of illness is that, as you go through it, your values are constantly changing. You try to figure out what matters to you, and then you keep figuring it out. It felt like someone had taken away my credit card and I was having to learn how to budget. You may decide you want to spend your time working as a neurosurgeon, but two months
... See morePaul Kalanithi • When Breath Becomes Air
I hope I can find all these great ideas if and when I need them. How different life would be if there were no need to remember, to hoard, to angst about stuff I want to know, or when it might be helpful.
Question: How can I judge myself less harshly and appreciate myself more?
Ram Dass on self-judgment:
I think that part of it is observing oneself more impersonally. I often use this image, which I think I have used already, but let me say it again. That when you go out into the woods and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some... See more
Ram Dass on self-judgment:
I think that part of it is observing oneself more impersonally. I often use this image, which I think I have used already, but let me say it again. That when you go out into the woods and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some... See more
Judgment gets in the way of belonging
We tend to overestimate what we can do in a day, and underestimate what we can achieve in a decade. Miraculous things can be accomplished if you give it ten years. A long game will compound small gains to overcome even big mistakes.
Kevin Kelly • 103 Bits of Advice I Wish I Had Known
One of the things about the Valley that I find outsiders miss the most is that it feels like it's all moving so fast, and yet, any of the important companies or any of the important products take a decade or more to build. Everything important takes a long time, so a lot of it actually feels quite slow. Long-term orientation is absolutely... See more
Marc Andreessen • Why We Should Be Optimistic About the Future
But having an enviable career is one thing, and being a happy person is another.
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is... See more
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is... See more
Bill Watterson • SOME THOUGHTS ON THE REAL WORLD BY ONE WHO GLIMPSED IT AND FLED
We send people away for years, tell them exactly what to do every day and they get to make exacrly one choice every day: do you obey or not? That's the only choice you get to make. Then, after 3, 5, 10 years, we send them out into society and tell them, "Make better choices." But we haven't prepared them for that at all. We have given them almost... See more