Sonya Sukalski
@sonyasukalski
Retired in 2022. I enjoy writing, gardening, hiking, biking, and new ideas.
Sonya Sukalski
But having an enviable career is one thing, and being a happy person is another.
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is... See more
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is... See more
Bill Watterson • SOME THOUGHTS ON THE REAL WORLD BY ONE WHO GLIMPSED IT AND FLED
We send people away for years, tell them exactly what to do every day and they get to make exacrly one choice every day: do you obey or not? That's the only choice you get to make. Then, after 3, 5, 10 years, we send them out into society and tell them, "Make better choices." But we haven't prepared them for that at all. We have given them almost... See more
Question: How can I judge myself less harshly and appreciate myself more?
Ram Dass on self-judgment:
I think that part of it is observing oneself more impersonally. I often use this image, which I think I have used already, but let me say it again. That when you go out into the woods and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some... See more
Ram Dass on self-judgment:
I think that part of it is observing oneself more impersonally. I often use this image, which I think I have used already, but let me say it again. That when you go out into the woods and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some... See more
Judgment gets in the way of belonging
Too often, we view the fight as an unalloyed virtue. Instead of sharing our preferences and desires before we get ill (as though it’s some sort of bad luck charm), we simply hope for the best and then wait far too long (and create too much family stress) before embracing the next step in our journey.
Seth Godin • Palliative care
But when determination, patience, and progress blend together, something amazing happens. The shape of the Great Plateau begins to change, and what was previously the flatness of despair shifts into an incline of hope. People really start to care, your audience regularly reaches out, and a viable career path emerges.
Lawrence Yeo • The Arc of the Practical Creator
Sierra
“I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don't want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don't want it to "not matter." I don't want it to be something that just passes.... See more
“My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person.
Why All Love Stories Are Destined to End in Tragedy
Beautiful! I hope if I have to come back and read this that it gives some solace.
Over the past couple of years my dad and sister have been battling cancer and my mum has had two strokes. This also made them more vulnerable during the coronavirus pandemic. Spending time with them and helping to look after them, plus coming to terms with the idea of losing them, has been a real challenge emotionally, especially as we live in
... See moreBec Brown • You've Got This: The essential career handbook for creative women
Vulnerability, fragility, how COVID plays into being immune compromised and living in a household that needs a low microbial load could be a whole book. Maybe this is the place to envision some new corner.
I think that most people who say, “Everything happens for a reason,” can fuck off to a frigid cave,
Rob Delaney • A Heart That Works
Every cancer doctor has said some version of, “we don’t know what causes cancer. No two cancers are exactly the same. Certain genes are turned on or off, and we don’t know why.” They also say, “There will be plenty of things to worry about later, so don’t try to do all the worrying right now. We work as a team during the transplant, and when you are in the hospital, because there are better outcomes all around.” What they don’t say is hopefully the one with cancer also has a team. We certainly do, and I have taken a deep dive into gratitude because of it. The neighbors bringing: gluten free everything bagels, roasted chicken, potatoes and carrots, stuffed peppers, vegan chili, vegan chickpea stew, cookies, hangar steak with mushrooms, green beans, broccoli, polenta… Friends checking in, sending poetry, funny and inspiring videos, stories, messages of encouragement. Family checking in much more than usual, offering to come and help with the care-giver responsibilities, helping with the every day chores, telling me about new resources. Friends taking me to tea, organizing a meet at a nearby brewpub, offering for us to stay at their house near the hospital, bringing pumpkins to carve, and offering to come sing Christmas songs.
The fatigue of grief is fucking staggering.
Rob Delaney • A Heart That Works
I wish I knew more the context for this quote, and I thank whoever it was that put Rob Delaney’s book on my radar! It has been hard to account for the fatigue. It feels like I do nothing but wait around in the transfusion clinic or at the hospital. And then give up more of what I thought made my life fulfilling. Not that those things really do, or that they are more important than being with my spouse through his bone marrow transplant story. But yeah, the fatigue is real.