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Female aggression, competition, and social control mechanisms
Nathalie Martinek PhD shows how feminine aggression manifests as politely soft social control. As a woman who refuses to employ this, being on the receiving end of it makes me feel like I’m nuts. Because as soon as you name this is happening, YOU become the problem, as I have been many ti
... See moreFemale socialization hinges on the denial of female bullying
When we say “believe women” it never seems to extend to believing female on female violence. And yes, I used that intentionally: women inflict psychological violence and then act like the victim if you react. Your expression of pain as the victim of said violence gets pathologized as aggre
... See moreHow Girls Are Rewarded for Disappearing- The Good Daughter Paradox
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How can any girl sustain the belief that she is loved, truly loved, when all around her she sees that femaleness is despised?
Bell Hooks • Communion
The figure of the feminist killjoy teaches us how the minimization of harm and the inflation of power often work together.
Sara Ahmed • The Feminist Killjoy Handbook: The Radical Potential of Getting in the Way
Invisible, soft social control is the norm.
Female social control is soft, indirect, insidious, and corrosive. I know there are other women out there like me who see clearly but are generally deemed “too sensitive” or worse, paranoid. The uncomfortable pattern: women deploy soft, deniable control as a social strategy. This is a structural phenomenon
... See moreWomen are still taught too often to be submissive, diminutive, obedient, and later nagging and caregiving—not to be peers, emotionally complex powerhouses, loving other women and trans bodies. These mistruths in gender norms are self-perpetuating, affirmed