Sublime

When I went off Prozac some years later in anticipation of trying to get pregnant, I reverted to my old self: cranky, questioning, restless. Almost immediately, my mother and I were at odds again. The very air in the room seemed to crackle when we were both in it.

A long deterioration that lasted four to ten weeks. Barbara became increasingly more critical, condemning, and short-tempered. She would deny her earlier apologetic remarks. Finally, there would be an angry explosion and the cycle would repeat anew.

How am I to have any kind of work life with this going on every day? It’s impossible. After I dropped him off at school, I just had to cry as I have no one to talk to who could possibly understand the terror of living with a child like this.

Through her years of recovery she began to move beyond her identity as that little girl who was unreal and undeserving of attention. She learned that belonging didn’t depend on her efforts to please others. Now her work and way of relating to others arise from a deep and genuine well of caring. But to awaken from her trance, my mother had to stop r

“PBSP psychomotor therapy,”