Sublime

Gil had originally begun couples counseling with Barb to “fix” her problem. He claimed that she was depressed, angry all the time, and had no interest in sex. He reported that he constantly walked on eggshells, trying to make sure he never did anything to upset her.

Therapy is hard work—and not just for the therapist. That’s because the responsibility for change lies squarely with the patient. If you expect an hour of sympathetic head-nodding, you’ve come to the wrong place. Therapists will be supportive, but our support is for your growth, not for your low opinion of your partner. (Our role is to understand y

For many whose needs were not met in their early years, needs feel humiliating and dangerous.

The problem arises when someone wants the job to provide what her parents did not provide for her: primary nurturing, relationship, self-esteem, and approval.

As you can see, working with early attachment issues is very delicate business, and clearly not every therapist or form of therapy is suited to it.

In my work with people in the helping professions, I have often been confronted with a childhood history that seems significant to me. • There was a mother* who at the core was emotionally insecure and who depended for her equilibrium on her child’s behaving in a particular way. This mother was able to hide her insecurity from her child and from ev

Therapists who are trained to see people as complex human beings with multiple characteristics and potentialities can help them explore their system of inner parts and take care of the wounded facets of themselves.