How to Be
A story of culture and norms overriding the default urge to find blame.
“…the primary purpose of an aircraft accident investigation is to prevent future accidents — a decision that implicitly privileged prevention above the search for liability. Conducting a police-style investigation that faults a deceased pilot does nothing to affect the probability of future accidents.”
Then I had another thought: Physics disgusts me a little bit now, but I used to enjoy doing physics. Why did I enjoy it? I used to play with it. I used to do whatever I felt like doing - it didn't have to do with whether it was important for the development of nuclear physics, but whether it was interesting and amusing for me to play with. When I
... See moreEveryone wants to know how to be liked. But I think we all know, actually, how to be liked, it’s just that it’s hard. It takes attention and openness, and the confidence to present your character like it’s a fun mask you’re wearing rather than a lesson you’re desperate to teach someone. If you have that, it’s simple: when people put energy into... See more
Sasha Chapin • What the humans like is responsiveness - by Sasha Chapin What the humans like is responsiveness
You should write because when you know that you’re going to write, it changes the way you live. I’m thinking about a book I read called Field Notes on Science & Nature , a collection of essays by scientists about their notes. It’s hard to imagine a more tedious concept — a book of essays about notes ? — but in execution it was wonderful. What it... See more
James Somers • More People Should Write
I think for years I was looking at my feet, I couldn’t look people straight in the eye, I was uncomfortable, I mean uncomfortable all the time, whereas today I enjoy being uncomfortable. It amuses me to understand that, yes, I have many doubts, that is what makes me alive, in fact. It allows me to move forward, I really like it.
I love not being uptight and I aspire for that
When I give of myself, when I genuinely care about others, I generate a feeling of connection, a feeling that is closely related to love. This is a feeling we long for. And it is common to think of it as something we must receive —that to feel a connection, we must find someone who sees us and who cares about our authentic self. But what people who... See more
Henrik Karlsson • On Feeling Connected
Therefore, what does it mean to live erotically in a world designed to suppress the erotic? It means making decisions that align with your aliveness, even if they offend your ego, your upbringing, your pay check. It means walking away from a job that kills your soul. Reading poetry instead of productivity manuals. Saying “yes” to a conversation... See more
Tamara • Erotic Decisions
“Well, I’m gonna get a lot of hell for saying this. I just want to put it out there. I know, I am. This is going to be a something that I might regret saying, but...I think one of the best things to cure self-doubt is just to go to really bad stuff. I’m talking about plays you hear about that are terrible–go to them. There’s shows on television... See more