trauma

The real problem is not just forgetfulness, but erasure: Filipinos remember colonization more clearly than their own precolonial selves, a habit reinforced by institutions that privilege the conquerors’ stories over our own.

But here’s the thing: every once in a while, I catch this peculiar feeling of nostalgia for times that were markedly bad . I think I feel nostalgic for these moments because of the kinship the moments require with yourself. The awareness, the attention, the tending, it’s like meeting yourself for the first time. It might sound trite, but it’s true.