on self respect and people pleasing
As a young woman I struck myself against everything—other bodies, cities, myself—but I could never make sense of the marks I made on them, or the marks they made on me. A thing of unknown value has no value, and I treated myself as such.
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
If I have learned anything from my study of empty consent, it is that I must turn on the lights and welcome every part of me into the room. If I want my yes to mean yes, there can be no locked doors in the house of me.
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
Emma and I nodded. Was that emotional labor? I wondered where to locate the line between sympathy and labor. I knew that they were not mutually exclusive, but also that there was a difference between caring for someone and performing care. How did a person know exactly when genuine expression became emotional labor?
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
I believe that self-respect and self-accountability are rarely discussed in the wellness industry because these concepts are often at odds with the capitalist nature of the industry.
However, I also think we don't have to choose one over the other. When self-respect is taken to an extreme, it can lead to perfectionism and self-criticism when we fail... See more
However, I also think we don't have to choose one over the other. When self-respect is taken to an extreme, it can lead to perfectionism and self-criticism when we fail... See more
Amalina on The Mazaj
Lacking it, we deplete self-esteem, we become unanchored, disconnected from ourselves and the deeper sense of dignity that gives life meaning. It is not about grand gestures or public recognition, but about the everyday moments where we prove to ourselves that we are dependable and worthy of trust. The way we speak to ourselves, the standards we... See more
They Convinced you to Love Yourself So you’d Forget to Respect Yourself
When we consistently follow through on our commitments, no matter how small, we reinforce a sense of integrity, of competence. Conversely, when we repeatedly neglect our own promises, we erode our self-respect, fostering guilt, disappointment, and a low self-esteem.
This is why self-respect is not something that can be granted to us by others; it is... See more
This is why self-respect is not something that can be granted to us by others; it is... See more
They Convinced you to Love Yourself So you’d Forget to Respect Yourself
Every decision we make is witnessed by the sitting observer within us; the part of ourselves that knows when we have honoured our word or betrayed it. This observer does not judge with external standards; it registers, with quiet certainty, whether we are living in alignment with our values or falling short of them. Over time, these observations... See more
They Convinced you to Love Yourself So you’d Forget to Respect Yourself
What becomes central is dignity, self-confidence, resilience, and an ability to rely on yourself. Unlike self-love, which has few, if any, conditions and can drift into narcissism or self-indulgence, self-respect demands a lot from us. It requires that we honour our commitments and uphold our moral principles practically. It requires that we... See more
They Convinced you to Love Yourself So you’d Forget to Respect Yourself
let the silence last a little longer before you fill it. say “i don’t know” when you don’t. be okay with needing things. allow yourself to disagree.