on girlhood, on womanhood

Female swagger, to XCX, comes with insecurity, because no matter how much bravado she displays, she must navigate overwhelming societal standards and expectations for her behavior. Brat , then, is about how hard it is to be a brat—to project untouchability and ambition in a world that relentlessly questions successful women.

That was part of being a girl—you were resigned to whatever feedback you’d get. If you got mad, you were crazy, and if you didn’t react, you were a bitch. The only thing you could do was smile from the corner they’d backed you into. Implicate yourself in the joke even if the joke was always on you.

I couldn’t wait to be inducted into the ranks of this female frustration—​the period as albatross, lunar burden, exit ticket from Eden, keys to the authenticity kingdom. Bleeding among the sharks meant being eligible for men, which meant being eligible for hope, loss, degradation, objectification, desire, and being desired—​a whole world of ways to

Among our Potawatomi people, women are the Keepers of Water. We carry the sacred water to ceremonies and act on its behalf. “Women have a natural bond with water, because we are both life bearers,” my sister said. “We carry our babies in internal ponds and they come forth into the world on a wave of water. It is our responsibility to safeguard the

How can any girl sustain the belief that she is loved, truly loved, when all around her she sees that femaleness is despised?