Identity

For a long time, I felt uneasy about not knowing exactly what I was meant to do. (And, to put it in context, that feeling was amplified by motherhood — something I wrote about at length here.) But now, I think the French have it right: you don’t have to know. You don’t even have to ask.

What they value instead is curiosity. Culture. Taste. The art... See more

But what if your purpose is simply to build a good life? To raise kind children. To cook a little better each year. To read a few excellent books. To notice the seasons. To build meaningful relationships. To help others. To give time - and money if you can - to causes you care about.

Now, my natural wiring leans toward clear lines and judgments. I like to quickly file things away in neat little categories: good or bad, right or wrong, love it or hate it. It makes the world easier to manage. But life isn’t quite that simple, and sometimes the best response isn’t a label—it’s space. Space to let things breathe, settle, and show... See more

Most people I know are walking contradictions. They care about the environment but drive gas-powered cars. They want authentic connections but spend hours on their phones. They believe in working hard, but also think the system is broken.

People are complicated. Thank God.

The problem is that complexity doesn't generate clicks, nuance doesn't go... See more