“Asking for help with shame says: You have the power over me. Asking with condescension says: I have the power over you. But asking for help with gratitude says: We have the power to help each other.”
what i had to do was a combination of exposure therapy (spending a bit more than felt comfortable) + emotional work:
i’d notice my tendency to choose discomfort over spending money → spend → freak out → explore / be with the feeling
also, active gratitude whenever i spent
A lot of people are just trying to get to tomorrow and don't have the luxury of getting to think about how good they can be. And so if you are in a place where you have any space to get to think about that, it's something to be grateful for.