Delivering Feedback

“People listen better if they feel that you have understood them. They tend to think that those who understand them are intelligent and sympathetic people whose own opinions may be worth listening to. So if you want the other side to appreciate your interests, begin by demonstrating that you appreciate theirs.”

― Roger Fisher, Getting to Yes:

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The most important ingredient for giving effective feedback is care for the other person.

Your intent must to be genuinely help the other person. You must see and validate them, and thus want what’s best for them. If you go into giving feedback with a kind of I mantra in your head—I want to sound smart, I want them to like me, I give them a piece of... See more

• #fyi — had a thought, no real hill to die on.


• #suggestion — there’s a hill, I’m not going to die on it. But this is what I would do if I were you.


• #recommendation — I’m climbing the hill, I won’t die on it. But I’ve thought about this a lot, and don’t ignore the feedback.


• #plea — I don’t like dying on hills and that’s not really what we do, but this

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