The most effective way to learn is by tuning in to the subtleties of your internal experience during the vicissitudes of daily life. This is especially true when you feel reactive, frustrated, or triggered by something or someone, as these are usually the moments when there is the most to sense, track, and feel.
Nobody wakes up feeling great and ready to get after it every day. The work is accepting your feelings and taking them along for the ride. It requires equal parts grace and grit, self-discipline and self-compassion.
Keep showing up.
It's easy to fall into the trap of feeling responsible for other people's emotions, reactions, and inner turmoil. We have an innate desire to be understood and accepted. So when others seem upset with us, judge us, or want us to change, we leap to explain, rationalize, and pacify. But in our quest to please or appease, we often lose ourselves.... See more
What makes your mind stronger, and more able to control your emotions, is internal discipline and toughness. No one can teach you this skill; you cannot learn it by reading about it. Like any discipline, it can come only through practice, experience, even a little suffering.