Awareness

Because most of our suffering comes from unconscious patterns of reaction. We get angry without realizing we're angry, feel afraid without recognizing the fear, act from conditioning without seeing we're conditioned. Each time we bring awareness to these patterns, they begin to lose their automatic quality.

Next time anxiety arises, try this experiment. Instead of immediately trying to get rid of it, get curious about it. Notice where you feel it in your body. Watch how your thoughts respond to it. Observe if you're resisting it or trying to make it go away. You're not trying to change anything - you're just watching what's already happening with inte... See more

Sometimes our suffering serves a purpose. It's like a warning signal telling us that something fundamental needs to change.

This is where his distinction between spirituality and psychology becomes clear. Psychology, as he sees it, often works at the level of managing and improving our existing patterns - helping us function better within our conditioning. Spirituality, as he defines it, is about waking up from the conditioning itself.

Instead, de Mello is suggesting that true happiness and completeness can only come from waking up to the fact that we are already complete - we've just been trained not to see it.