Authors destroying me

“I don’t mind worriers,” I said. “Worrying is the correct worldview. Life is worrisome.”

To me, there is no clearer message: Chaos reigns.

For some of us, the fear of intimacy overpowers the desire for it. It feels safer to be alone or in relationships where we are “unemotionally involved” than it does to be emotionally vulnerable, close, and loving. I understand that. In spite of the range of needs and wants that go unmet when we don’t love, it may feel safer to not love. We don’t ri

AVOIDANCE. Avoidance is usually about fear. Emotions and relationships have hurt me, so I will minimize emotions and relationships. People who are avoidant feel most comfortable when the conversation stays superficial. They often overintellectualize life. They retreat to work. They try to be self-sufficient and pretend they don’t have needs. Often,

His joy is raw in a way that makes me feel like I can unzip my skin suit and show him all the ooze inside.

That was how I’d always imagined the surface of my heart—smooth, slick, unattached. Nothing to grab on to. Unscored. No one could attach to me once the inevitable heat of life bore down. I suspected the metaphor went deeper still—that I was afraid of marring my heart with the scoring that arose naturally between people, the inevitable bumping again

Beauty could be deceptive, and it often was. Vipers, after all, distract with shimmering scales before going in for the kill.

“Nothing is so privileged as thinking history belongs to the past.”

If you remove the foundation of trust from a relationship, then what is the point of that relationship?”