You Can Ignore Your ‘Self’ and Just Improve

To write in e-prime , simply omit any version of the word “to be” from your prose. Drop is, am, are, were, or was , and also their cousins — the isn’ts, the will-bes, the would-have-been, could-have-been, should-have-beens — scrap them all.

You can treat a lot of “I am” problems this way, reframing them as simpler “I do” problems. Most traits we want to change have one or two simple actions at their core. Instead of “ stop being messy ,” clean. Instead of “ stop being so shy ,” meet people.

Finding the core action can release all of that diverted, shackled mental energy; once you find ... See more

Find the core. Do it a lot. Learn what you need as you go. Trust it will change you.