Who Are You, Really?: The Surprising Puzzle of Personality (TED Books)

The greatest value in thinking of personality as “doing projects” rather than “having traits” is in three powerful words: potential for change. We can consciously choose and adapt our projects in ways that we cannot change our traits.

Hyperconnected Projects: If you rated some of the projects that matter to you as low on “visibility to others” and not much valued by other people, these are flags that such projects might run into trouble. But you may have the opposite problem—you may be hyperconnected with others. Other people usually initiate your projects, they value them deepl

there’s another key factor that determines whether this project ultimately builds you up or wears you down: How much support you have from those with whom you are connected.

Choose a diverse set of people to share your projects with, communicate clearly about what matters to you, share projects wholeheartedly with the most important people—and you grant yourself a greater chance of success.

Personal projects can also be fairly trivial pursuits, like taking the dog (or the cat that thinks it’s a dog)18 for a walk. But they can also represent the highest reaches of human aspiration and acts of courage.

The Emotional Tenor of Personal Projects: Your life may be imbued with projects that are meaningful, manageable, and effectively connected with others, and yet problems might arise with the kinds of feelings you experience when you are pursuing them.

most important aspect of manageability, however, is your sense of efficacy—the expectation that your projects are going to be successful.

These dynamic features are what I call the personal contexts of your life.

when it comes to well-being, projects can trump traits.