Unpacking ‘The Secret Life of Secrets’

People can feel glad someone felt comfortable enough to reveal something sensitive; it’s an act of intimacy that can bring us closer together.

With positive secrets, there’s usually a plan for when they will be revealed — and because they have an expiration date, those secrets can be exciting and energizing.

the question is, How can we steal the benefits from positive secrets and apply them to negative secrets?

There are three primary dimensions by which people think about their secrets. One is what we call “social connectedness” — secrets that involve other people. Another dimension is how moral the secret is. A third is how it’s related to our goals, which often means our profession. Each dimension has a unique harm.