To be sure, children are ignorant of the background knowledge that adults have, but that’s what childhood is—the process of building up sufficient background knowledge so that they don’t need an adult to take care of them.

Kids may trust their parents in specific domains, such as physical safety, and this is of course crucial. But there is an enormous difference between partial and total trust. If kids don’t trust their parents completely, then that means there are some issues where kids will seek guidance from someone else. Therefore, rules—contrary to their stated

Eating may be the most personal human experience.

have a trusted and knowledgeable person available for questions. This lifeline can only work if this person has the child’s best interests at heart, and only if the child believes this.

A crucial guard against risk is to have a trusted and knowledgeable person available for questions. This lifeline can only work if this person has the child’s best interests at heart, and only if the child believes this.

The reason kids should have free rein with regard to food is that they are building an understanding of how to eat in the same way that they are building an understanding of everything else in life: by exploration, discovery, and trial and error.

When I feel like going to sleep, I tell my kids that I’m tired and that I don’t feel like playing with them anymore. Then, just like adults, my kids find ways to entertain themselves with technology like iPads until they’re ready for bed according to their own preferences. When I make staying up less interesting, my kids are less interested in

Forbidden foods become extra tempting.

Specifically, there are two kinds of good interpersonal constraints: Other people’s boundaries. We don’t want kids to think they can demand anything they want from others. Constraints that they accept voluntarily, such as the rules of a game or conventions of politeness.