The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence

We have a deep cultural intuition that nice guys finish last, that one must step on others to rise in the ranks, and that acquiring power requires the cold-blooded dispensing of rivals and even allies. But nothing could have been further from the truth.

the group’s interests. POWER COMES FROM EMPOWERING OTHERS IN SOCIAL NETWORKS

This new definition of power reveals that it is not something limited to rare individuals in dramatic moments of their highly visible lives—to malevolent dictators, high-profile politicians, or the jet-setting rich and famous; nor does it exist solely in boardrooms, on battlefields, or on the U.S. Senate floor. Instead, power defines the waking lif

GROUPS GIVE POWER TO THOSE WHO ADVANCE THE GREATER GOOD

First, reputations create opportunities for influence. Studies find that if you have a reputation for advancing the greater good, others will direct more resources to you. They will seek you out to form friendships and alliances. They will collaborate with you more cooperatively and effectively.

Power is the medium through which we relate to one another. Power is about making a difference in the world by influencing others.

Power is not only the capacity to influence others; it is also a state of mind.

In my experiment, the strongest predictor of which dorm dwellers rose to the top within the first week of arriving at college, and which ones remained there through the year, was enthusiasm.

Stay focused on other people. Prioritize others’ interests as much as your own. Bring the good in others to completion, and do not bring the bad in others to completion. Take delight in the delights of others, as they make a difference in the world.