The Path Between Us: An Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships

In a relationship with a One, honesty is essential, but telling them that they are good in ways that they can hear it is the greater gift. Do it as often as you can in all the ways you can.

Nines see two sides to everything, for better and for worse. This makes it very difficult for Nines to make a decision, which leads to merging in relationships.

In relation to choices and behavior, Nines are the least controlling of all the numbers. Their appreciation for independence is a two-way street: they want theirs and they want you to have yours.

Sevens believe their needs are simple and few, when in reality they are complex people with complex needs.

If you’re in a relationship with a Nine, you will have to accept that their lives are made up of distractions. Even when intentional about their focus, they often get lost in doing something that isn’t part of the plan for the day.

Focus on what Nines do as opposed to what they forget or fail to do.

“It’s not lazy—it’s getting busy doing something that keeps you from doing what you ought to be doing.”

When Sevens do anything out of a sense of duty, their lack of enthusiasm is palpable; they are present, but they hold back on their energy waiting for some future event that is more promising.

The Withdrawing Stance (Fours, Fives, Nines). These people are slow to act because they are often shy or introverted. They are seen as moving away from others, and their orientation to time is the past.