The Myth of Male Power

Men don’t have a unifying force of women-as-jerks or oppressors. Men’s purpose in being trained to kill was, ironically, at least in part to protect the sex that now considers them the “oppressor.” To die for a woman’s love is one thing. To die for women who think of him as a jerk, enemy, or “oppressor” feels more like saving the enemy. The challen

Why, then, did men’s life expectancy go from one year less than women’s in 1920 to seven years less today? Because men’s performances—inventing, manufacturing, selling, and distributing—saved women, but no one saved men from the pressure to perform. She went from being a baby machine, cooking machine, and cleaning machine to having time for love. H

Each history book is 500 pages of advertisements for the performer role. Each lesson tells him, “If you perform, you will get love and respect; if you fail, you will be a nothing.” To a boy, history is pressure to perform, not relief from that pressure. Feminism is relief from the pressure to be confined to only the traditional female role. To a bo

They see their sex being identified as the discriminators, rapists, date rapists, deadbeat dads, wife-batterers, sexual harassers, serial killers, greedy “banksters,” and unfaithful cheaters. It can feel as if they are at the top, bottom and middle of women’s “enemy list.”

The more beautiful the woman was when she was younger, the more she had been treated like a celebrity—what I call a genetic celebrity—and therefore the more she felt like a has-been. It’s harder to lose something you’ve had than never to have it to begin with. As she became increasingly invisible, she felt increasingly disposable and increasingly a

Stage I societies had a dilemma: marriage guaranteed women economic security for a lifetime but failed to guarantee men sexual gratification for a lifetime. So Stage I societies created a marital deal: what I call the “Marital Triangle.” The Marital Triangle was the husband, wife, and mistress (or, depending on the culture, the geisha, prostitute,

When he did express his concerns, they were dismissed as his “male midlife crisis.” Essentially, though, women’s liberation and the male midlife crisis were the same search—for personal fulfillment, common values, mutual respect, love. But while women’s liberation was thought of as promoting identity, the male midlife crisis was thought of as an id

Every woman knows that if there was only male birth control, she would not feel in control, she would feel out of control. “Trust me” from a man is laughable; “trust me” from a woman is the law. Birth control created the right of women to choose and the expectation of men to trust. Today, every man who puts a penis in a woman’s body also puts his l

if you are both reader and leader, that just as the women’s movement redefined women and expanded our daughters’ future, you will employ The Myth of Male Power to redefine men and expands our sons’ future—thus preparing our sons to become the men our daughters will be proud to love.