The Future of Seduction

The problem with the minimal-investment approach to seduction – bred by an overload of options on dating apps and infiltrating courtship more broadly – is that it is difficult to drum up desire in the absence of effort.

The matching potential of the genome is not entirely without merit: kissing is hypothesised to be subconsciously used by women to gauge the health and genetic make-up of a potential mate through saliva, as well as for eliciting arousal through the exchange of hormones.

Despite the seeming sexual smorgasbord on offer, dating apps are surprisingly short on seduction. Longitudinal studies show that singles are having less sex and fewer partners than a generation ago.

In a study of the most successful words for men to put on an online profile, ‘physically fit’ upped response rate by a whopping 96 per cent;10 in another, the number-one word for men to use on a profile was – wait for it – ‘6ft’.

In communities around the world in which there is a surplus, or perceived surplus, of women, men pursue a mating strategy geared towards multiple casual relationships.

Being made to feel special – even if just for an evening – is at the crux of seduction regardless of gender.

In one study of singles on the pull in a bar, researchers observed 109 distinct ‘attraction tactics’, including offering to buy someone a drink, sucking seductively on a straw, puffing out one’s chest, and maintaining eye contact.

Natural rewards, including orgasm, contain a built-in satiety at consummation relying, inter alia, on endogenous opioids. But when we’re stuck in the dopaminergic excitement of seeking, Kringelbach explained, there is no signal telling us when to stop.

Trading in insecurities, dating is one of few services in which dissatisfaction leads users to question themselves instead of the product, and even increase spending to up the odds of success.