they fire question after question at you, like a machine gun in a jungle.

He leaves no opportunity for his captive to offer a confession of any kind. The captive is not allowed to expand, offer additional evidence, ask questions, or even have a glass of water.

1. Learn to want to listen. You must have the desire, interest, concentration, and self-discipline. 2. To be a good listener, give verbal and visual cues that you are listening. 3. Anticipate excellence. We get good information more often when we expect it. 4. Become a “whole body” listener: Listen with your ears, your eyes, and your heart. 5. Take

Save your demands for later in the relationship.

Fear of rejection keeps many of us from risking conversation,

How did you get started in your business? • How did you come up with this idea? • What got you interested in ______ (business function, job, industry)? • What happened first? • Tell me what you enjoy most about your profession. • What separates your firm from the competition?

Describe some of the challenges of your profession. • What will be the coming trends in your business? • What ways have you found to be the most effective in promoting your business? • Tell me about your most important work experience. • What advice would you give someone just starting out in your business? • What one thing would you do if you knew

Behavior. If you are observant, you’ll get a lot of free information from people’s behavior. The way they speak and write can offer you small talk starters. Notice if they are left-handed. You can inquire, Is it challenging being left-handed? What pet peeves do you have about it? Does the person have an accent? If so, you might say, I thought

Stop being an adviser. When you mention a problem you might be having with an employee or an associate, do people offer advice without asking any questions?