The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter--And How to Make the Most of Them Now

Working toward our potential becomes what psychoanalyst and developmental theorist Karen Horney called “a search for glory” when, somehow, we learn more about what is ideal than about what is real.

I notice that many twentysomethings—especially those who surround themselves with other twentysomethings—have trouble anticipating not death but life.

Feeling better, then, doesn’t come from avoiding adulthood. It comes from investing in adulthood.

the twentysomething brain reacts to surprise and criticism—usually emotionally and strongly and negatively—and how this makes many twentysomethings feel like, as one colleague says, leaves in the wind. A good day at work lifts us high in the air while a reprimand from a boss whips us down to the ground.

Twentysomethings who don’t feel anxious and incompetent at work are usually overconfident or underemployed.

The future isn’t written in the stars. There are no guarantees. So claim your adulthood. Be intentional. Get to work. Pick your family. Do the math. Make your own certainty. Don’t be defined by what you didn’t know or didn’t do. You are deciding your life right now.

If we only wanted to be happy, it would be easy; but we want to be happier than other people, which is almost always difficult, since we think them happier than they are. —Charles de Montesquieu, writer/philosopher

Twentysomething jobs teach us about regulating our emotions and negotiating the complicated social interactions that make up adult life. Twentysomething work and school are our best chance to acquire the technical, sophisticated skills needed in so many careers today. Twentysomething relationships prepare us for marriage and other partnerships. Twe

I saw that bigness came from investing in what I had, from taking part in what was in front of me.