It’s not about you, a separate person, being relaxed or peaceful, or trying to rest; it’s about a deeper sense of relaxation that comes with knowing that every thought, every sensation, every feeling, including all the painful ones, are already accepted in the space that you are. Knowing that, in the moment, even your nonacceptance is deeply accept

in reality you are not a separate person, not an individual self, but the open space in which all of the little waves of experience—thoughts, sensations, sounds, feelings—come and go. You are, quite literally, what you seek. You are the consciousness that holds the dance of form.

When we say, “I want to be attractive. I want to be beautiful,” what we must mean is that we want to feel attractive all the time and never feel ugly. Remember, what you are cannot be anything in particular, but what you are is the capacity to feel anything now. We want to be something fixed and solid in time and space, and yet when we look, we fin

Perhaps this was not my life to hold up in the first place. Perhaps I wasn’t really who I thought I was. Perhaps true freedom had nothing to do with being a better wave in the ocean, with perfecting my story of myself. Perhaps freedom was all about waking up from the dream that we are separate waves in the first place and embracing all that appears

Our fear is not really the fear of failure or ugliness or pain, but what these things symbolize in our world. And for many people, failure is linked to disapproval, rejection, abandonment, and, ultimately, lack of love.

By the time a wave appears, it has already been accepted by what you are. The arrival of a wave is its acceptance.

Which thoughts and judgments, from yourself and from others, hurt? Which thoughts do you perceive as negative? Can this perception tell you which images of yourself you are still defending in the moment? Where do you go to war in defense of a false image of yourself? Which waves of experience are you trying to protect yourself from? What are you no

What I’m saying is that if we are to be truly free, we must face this reality with open eyes. We must move away from denial, wishful thinking, and hope, and tell the truth about life as it is. Great freedom lies in admitting the truth of this moment, however much it clashes with our hopes, dreams, and plans.

Seen in this way, suffering is always, always a signpost pointing back to wholeness.