“Don’t lament this and don’t get agitated.” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 7.43 There’s that feeling we get when something happens: It’s all over now. All is lost. What follows are complaints and pity and misery—the impotent struggle against something that’s already occurred. Why bother? We have no idea what the future holds. We have no idea what’s

It’s not about overcoming our fears but understanding that both hope and fear contain a dangerous amount of want and worry in them. And, sadly, the want is what causes the worry.

Life is in a constant state of change. And so are we. To get upset by things is to wrongly assume that they will last. To kick ourselves or blame others is grabbing at the wind. To resent change is to wrongly assume that you have a choice in the matter. Everything is change. Embrace that. Flow with it.

“no one does wrong on purpose.” The clearest proof of that hypothesis? All the times we did wrong without malice or intention. Remember them? The time you were rude because you hadn’t slept in two days. The time you acted on bad information. The time you got carried away, forgot, didn’t understand. The list goes on and on. This is why it is so

“I’ll never be ashamed to quote a bad writer with a good saying.”

If you find yourself trying to persuade someone to change or do something differently, remember what an effective lever self-interest is. It’s not that this or that is bad, it’s that it is in their best interest to do it a different way. And show them—don’t moralize.

It’s most easy to prove that so-called pleasures, when they go beyond proper measure, are but punishments.”

Let the news come when it does. Be too busy working to care.

The pragmatist, the person of action, is too busy to waste time on such silliness. The pragmatist can’t worry about every possible outcome in advance. Think about it. Best case scenario—if the news turns out to be better than expected, all this time was wasted with needless fear. Worst case scenario—we were miserable for extra time, by choice.