But while the changes in a dad’s brain do resemble those in a mom’s, the dad brain also drives contributions that are different from mom’s. For mom, it’s baby talk and staring into the baby’s eyes; for dad, it’s playful touching and behavior, physically moving the baby, and introducing the baby to new objects.34

The best gift we can give a boy, to help him become self-actualized enough to feel free to choose to be either traditional or nontraditional, is a mom and dad devoted to the art and discipline of raising children together, even if that means living in separate, but nearby, homes. Once a family of four hits an income threshold where they can afford

And that value kicks in early. Toddlers whose dads encouraged exploring (while setting limits) had better social and emotional skills twelve to eighteen months later.17

The discipline of postponing gratification is the single most important discipline your son needs.

We have seen that the amount of time a father spends with a child is “one of the strongest predictors of empathy in adulthood.”6 Teaching a child to treat boundaries seriously teaches him or her to respect the needs of others.

They have different ways of setting boundaries and enforcing boundaries; exploring in nature; roughhousing; creating teachable moments; challenging the kids’ limits; using hangout time; and different attitudes toward teasing. Researchers have also documented dads’ greater tendencies to • walk a fine line between safety and risk-taking; • juggle the

Dads and moms both love their children deeply, but differently.

In the traditional male hero’s hierarchy of needs, self-actualization is nowhere to be found—because the more he values himself, the less he is willing to sacrifice himself.

Dad deprivation still leaves boys vulnerable to Nazis—these days, neo-Nazi groups.