I wish we could treat our bodies as the place we live from, rather than regard it as a place to be worked on, as though it were a disagreeable old kitchen in need of renovation and update. SUSIE ORBACH

Connection is your most basic way of being, from infancy to old age. The more you can experience and celebrate your connection with yourself, your partners, and with everyone and everything in your lives, the more you become able to access your capacity for pleasure and ecstasy. Embracing the fact that we’re hardwired for connection and pleasure is

A simple and easy way to launch the shift from soundless to soundful is to make your breathing audible. Try turning up the volume and breathing loudly. • Take a deep breath in and let it out with a soft sigh. Experiment with bigger, louder, deeper sighs. Try some ‘flop on the couch after a long hard day’ sighs. • Play with changing the tone and

To become more erotically adept, create intentions related to learning, practicing, expanding and experimenting, whether on your own or with partners. When you begin an erotic session, or play any of the games in this book, I invite you to create conscious intentions. Have them be clear, self-loving and pleasure-positive. Notice how that alters

Creativity is a type of learning process where the teacher and pupil are located in the same individual. ARTHUR KOESTLER

For example, research on the enteric nervous system, the ‘brain in the belly,’ shows it has more nerve cells than the central nervous system. Your belly has its own set of smarts and often gives instructions to the brain.

How do you deal with your wandering attention? By practicing awareness and paying attention to paying attention. Your attention is trainable. Like a muscle, it gets stronger with use. Most of us haven’t gotten much experience in teaching our attention to stay focused, but we can all become more skilled at attending. As you train yourself to attend,

If you predominantly stimulate one nerve pathway, you’re most likely to experience arousal and orgasm that are focused on its end-organ system. Thus, when you mostly play with the parts connected to the primary genital (pudendal) pathway, you’re likely to have a clitoral or penile orgasm. Utilize the pelvic nerve path and you’ll get orgasms that

Sexuality is primarily a function of the older, more primitive parts of our brain. Sexual energy is animal energy and our animal selves live in the limbic system and old brain. Sex taps into ancient evolutionary machinery that resides, so to speak, in the cranial basement. You need to go down the brain elevator if you want to really get down