And if our internal working models tell us that we can’t rely on others to be there for us in times of need, we will not allow ourselves to depend on them.

“I know you’re trying to keep me safe, and to point out ways that I need to improve, but your harsh criticism and judgment is not helping at all. Please stop being so critical, you are causing me unnecessary pain.”

By honoring the limitations of our own human imperfection, we can be more forgiving of others’ mistakes.

The past doesn’t exist except in our memories, and the future doesn’t exist except in our imagination.

Because I wanted so desperately to be loved and accepted, I began to change myself into the person he thought I should be.

escape from painful feelings is not actually possible, our best option is to clearly but compassionately experience our difficult emotions just as they are in the present moment.

I joined was because I was drowning in feelings of shame, guilt, and unworthiness; and I was desperately looking to find some inner peace.

We all know that positive, reassuring messages create the mind-state most conducive to working hard and reaching one’s highest potential. We need to feel calm, secure, and confident in order to do our best. That’s why when we try to motivate those we love, we usually bend over backward to let them know we believe in them, that they have our undying

Research shows that people tend to think they’re funnier, more logical, more popular, better looking, nicer, more trustworthy, wiser, and more intelligent than others.