Recognise the point of giving advice and you can do it better | Psyche Ideas
Joshua Habgood-Cootepsyche.co
Recognise the point of giving advice and you can do it better | Psyche Ideas
When people are upset that their advice has gone unheeded, there are often two things going on. Yes, they’re worried that someone is making a bad decision, but they also feel hurt that their perspective hasn’t been properly valued. Think about how much you might be affected by that second emotion. Think too about how the desire to protect can somet
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Mike "Bagel" added
Tania Clarke and added
When I first started out, though, occasionally I’d feel pressure to give advice of the benign (or so I believed) sort. But then I realized that people resent being told what to do. Yes, they may have asked to be told—repeatedly, relentlessly—but after you comply, their initial relief is replaced by resentment. This happens even if things go swimmin
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But the satisfaction of being advice-giver is short lived, as the advice I have dispensed, whether directly solicited or not, will almost certainly not be followed up on with any real action. This is a virtual guarantee, seemingly regardless of the enthusiasm, energy and attributes of the receiver in question. It just seems to be one of those thing... See more
Thomas Bevan • On The Futility of Offering Advice
sari added
When you’re doubting your ability to overcome an obstacle, instead of seeking advice, try giving advice.
Adam Grant • Hidden Potential: The Science of Achieving Greater Things
Katharina Sommerkamp added
Time & Care
When people seek advice, it often isn’t advice they want, but someone to listen. A good listener — someone who is present, who asks probing questions, who doesn’t use the person’s pain as a starting gun for them to speak — is a balm for anxiety. That’s why a good listener makes a useful partner in problem-solving. Some of the best m... See more
When people seek advice, it often isn’t advice they want, but someone to listen. A good listener — someone who is present, who asks probing questions, who doesn’t use the person’s pain as a starting gun for them to speak — is a balm for anxiety. That’s why a good listener makes a useful partner in problem-solving. Some of the best m... See more
Listen
Alan Soucier added
Each of you can benefit from what the other one knows,” says Peurifoy. “To receive and hold on to the wisdom that’s imparted to you without prejudice is critical.” After all, giving advice is a form of sharing your own experiences. If a friend offers you advice based on their life, listen. You don’t have to treat it as a lesson; instead, you can fr
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Mike "Bagel" and added
When you ask people for help, most people give you advice. Advice is when someone tells you what they would do. And since you’re not that person, it’s rarely useful to hear what they would do. You want to know what you should do.
Counsel, on the other hand, is when someone helps you figure out what you think. Counsel is invaluable because it helps y... See more
Counsel, on the other hand, is when someone helps you figure out what you think. Counsel is invaluable because it helps y... See more
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