Radical Alignment: How to Have Game-Changing Conversations That Will Transform Your Business and Your Life

Often during this section, easy fixes for a concern emerge—agreements, rules, budgetary triggers, and so forth—that could mitigate or eliminate the concern. This is wonderful, but for now keep it to yourself, perhaps by jotting down a quick note. The All-In Method (AIM) is not for problem solving but for information sharing, and suggesting an agree

At home, poor communication often leads to unnecessary conflict that destabilizes our relationships and turns sources of support into sources of anguish. When we are in regular conflict with our partner, we might

The most valuable facilitation method we’ve found is to have people “journal” their answers onto Post-it® notes (one idea per note), then share them one at a time as they place their notes on a specific section of wall, whiteboard, or a flip-chart panel associated with that section—gathering all intentions in one spot, concerns in another, and so f

are . . .” indicate

The goal of the conversation is to create a full and complete understanding of each other—this does not mean you agree with all that is said, only that you truly hear it.

about our counterpart and the topic. When one person feels disrespected, manipulated, taken advantage of, or disregarded, tension or conflict will usually be the result. Likewise, when a person feels respected, listened to, and considered, even profound disagreements can lose their power. We become more

done. Even a household or neighborhood has a culture. If you want better communication between two or more people, then creating a regular cadence of specialized touchpoints—meetings and tools—is one way to improve it. In our marriage, we schedule monthly “money and planning” meetings in which we use AIM to guide us. Working agreements are often us

John Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Relationship Apocalypse theory shows how criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling lead to breakdown and disengagement. (We avoid these in our marriage, too!)

Finally, ask the big question. How safe do you feel in this team or this relationship? If in a work

happen? What will you get out of it? How will your relationship be after this meeting?). Going into important or high-stakes conversations brings up emotions, and you might not show up as your best, most confident self without structured preplanning. Writing down your intentions, concerns, boundaries, and dreams and having your notes in front of yo