Permission to Parent

“Our children are our guests for eighteen years. We have to treat our guests with the utmost respect.” —Jackie, mom of three

When a mother or father trash talks their spouse or ex, the child is forced to defend the other parent. Try not to let home feel like a competition in which a child has to pick sides. Don’t discuss your relationship woes with your kids. Remember that our biggest task as parents is to build secure attachments, not competing ones. You don’t need to b

Don’t be afraid to be in charge.” —Daphne Hirsh, MD, pediatrician “Parenting is a benevolent dictatorship.” —Robert Landaw, MD, pediatrician “Don’t let the inmates run the asylum.” —Ken Newman, MD, psychiatrist

was always very conscious of the routines in my home. After a while, routine becomes ritual.” —Elizabeth, mother of three And the ordinary becomes sacred. If home is remembered as solid ground, people can reach further and withstand greater challenges. Family traditions lay down roots. The deeper the roots, the higher the tree can grow toward the l

So I came up with Family Talking Teasers. Now we ask things like: ‘If you were parent for a day, what rules would you make?’ Or ‘If you could wake up in any country tomorrow, what would it be and why?’ Or ‘What’s your idea of heaven on earth?’ ”

Without missing a beat he replied, “It was so easy. I let hard work teach the lesson. Every summer I would scour the want ads for the hardest, most physically taxing summer jobs that I could find that paid minimum wage. One summer I had my son Dan loading heavy boxes onto a truck from morning until night. When he asked me to buy him a pair of baske

Home is not just a place. Home is a state of being.” —Laura Carlin, author and blogger

Trust me, I hear stories daily of adults who were scared of their parents or fed a diet of shame. I can promise you that this is not the recipe for self-esteem.

Thirty years later, his heart is still full as the memories of that night flicker on. CHAPTER NINE Love’s Lasting Legacy There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is. —Albert Einstein