Make Something Up

Jenny’s dog only stands there, part black Lab, part stupid, looking at Jenny. Jenny looking at Hank.

“everything that my neighbors touch they ruin.” And he began plotting his revenge.

He lifted his hand and curled a finger, beckoning them to come closer. None of them moved.

By nightfall, the mammoth penis loomed over them. So tall it disappeared into the gloaming. It was of course uncircumcised.

The way she pitched it, screwing Flamingo wasn’t adultery so much as it was a continuing education investment in pleasing his wife.

His impossible task, Felix’s trial had been to make a life in this seething home where every slice of bread was buttered with disdain.

Every city has such a barrier, tangible or intangible. To preserve the respect of the fallen and the sensitivity of the others.

the nature of happiness is that we only recognize it after the fact.

I tell them, “I’m in love with a beautiful sex-crazed slut so why can’t you just be happy for me?” And after all that fuss there’s a lot less people at our wedding than you’d expect.