Note that the right time to do this is not when they’re in the middle of one of their cold periods—if they aren’t reaching out to you, then there’s no leverage. This is only effective in a situation where they pop up wanting something from you, when you do have leverage.

Being so anxiously attached (or avoidant) we can never relax and end up sabotaging every relationship?

One of the love life myths is that somehow love is a special realm where we can be guided by instinct. But this assumes that in childhood we all developed great instincts for every situation.

Still, it can hurt not to have someone, and once you start adding up all the little aches, you wind up with a chronic condition. Some days, when you have a lot on your plate and feel confident, or at least happily preoccupied with life, the stress is manageable. Other days, it can feel like a constant battle against an opponent only you can see.

new perspective that allowed him to

If your relationship gets worse when

The moment you settle on Plan C, it immediately becomes the new Plan A, and makes the new Plan A so beautiful that you never look back.

Relying too much on our identity matrix for confidence leaves us vulnerable to shifts of fortune.

Filling out an identity matrix is a straightforward way to be honest about where your priorities are, and what you might need to shift to become happier and more confident.