Love Life: How to raise your standards, find your person and live happily (no matter what)

even if these fantasies remain unknown to the object of your attraction, your private fascination still has a way of showing up when you meet again.

we’re used to wild shifts of erratic behavior, it can be hard to stick with even a healthy relationship that doesn’t provide that volatility.

We can say no to someone who has different intentions, regardless of whether we have someone to replace them.

set up a nearly impossible situation for her new partners, who had to make her feel the same level of desire she felt for her ex—except that it had always been a desire that was predicated on making her feel uneasy.

“F-U confidence” comes from having that kind of sturdy support in your life already.

to control the conversation, to keep things light and moving. Sometimes this means she nukes whole topics of interest before anyone can say a word, and it often means there’s almost always no room for vulnerability or curiosity while she’s holding court, both of which require space and sincerity and sometimes silence in place of wisecracks and upro

energy that pushes people away.

And becoming the magic often ends up being the indirect way we get the results we sought in the first place.

the love of your life can only ever be the person who chooses you for their life. It can never be the person who doesn’t choose you.