Saved by sari and
Looking for Alice
Jacob Falkovich says that single people often seek out similarity when complementarity is what makes relationships cohere long-term. It’s a great observation. But how to operationalize it? Maybe: look for someone you can’t initially understand, but also don’t feel like walking away from.
Sasha Chapin • Getting married soon
The real thing people should be actively looking for is strong emotional connection, as in: to what degree can I share who I am with this person, do they get it , how interested are they in who I am, my feelings and thoughts, can we accommodate each other’s preferences, are we good at talking. Once I asked a very happy couple how they knew they wer... See more
the agony of eros: dating
The type of person I’m assuming we’re looking for here is 1) someone that you will find fascinating to talk to after you’ve talked for 20,000 hours, 2) you feel comfortable with them talking through the hardest and most painful decisions you will face in your life, and 3) the conversation is wildly generative for both of you, in that it brings you ... See more
Henrik Karlsson • Looking for Alice
If you want to find someone who is much like yourself in attitude, tastes, and interests, you have to look where such a person is likely to be found. And you can’t expect him to recognize you if you hide your identity behind a mask in order to get along with the people you’re with.
Harry Browne • How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
On Finding Your People:
I’m told I have an unusual talent for finding wonderful people. Below is my strategy for having a rich social life in any large city
Disclaimer: This will require you acting in a way that is not normal. You may need to decide whether you want to be normal yet lonely or unusual yet connected
0. Treat it as a second job.
For... See more